Thursday, September 24, 2009

Address!!

Hello hello! I keep forgetting to post the address!!

Reach International
El Hogar de Ninos
Shearin Matute
APDO 20
Santa Barbara, Honduras

The kids at the Infa don't have anything. They need shampoo, toothpaste, toothbrushes, cleaning supplies... shoes, clothes, toys... seriously anything that you figure every person should have.... because these kids most likely don't have them. If they do, it's usually only one pair and they're usually dirty and very worn. And if you don't think you can send anything, you can send me money and I'll let you know everything that I buy with it so you know where it's going. I can even take pictures if you want. Just get in contact with me.. send me an email at shearyberry@gmail.com. I may not answer right away because the internet isn't available all the time, but I will answer eventually. Thank you everyone for your concern and for your help. You have no idea how much I appreciate it.. and I know the kids will appreciate it too.

September 22

The president of Honduras has sneaked his way back into the country. Tarynn and I don’t really know too much about it, but he was kicked out of the country because of corruption and he was trying to stay president for longer. Someone told me that he is hiding in the Brazilian embassy now. I don’t know all the details… but this means that curfews are back in place now. Before this, there were just check points. There were Honduran soldiers or police… I’m not sure… but they would stand random places in the streets and stop trucks if they were suspicious. They worried me at first because they’ve got some pretty big guns on them, but I was assured that they’re there for our safety and to protect us against those people who are on the ex president’s side and are looking to cause trouble. Now no one is allowed in the streets between a certain time. Maria Jose is worried about riots and such so she said that we couldn’t go to the Infa today. She wants to see what happens and see if things clear up. She says there are mostly problems in a bigger city called Tegucigalpa, but she doesn’t want to risk anything.

School was also cancelled because of this and so all the kids stayed at the Hogar for the day. The kids had to do a massive cleaning in the morning because their rooms smelled like pee. It really was terrible. I had a hard time being in there and waking them up and putting them to bed on Sunday. I’m glad she had them do that. She had everything taken out of their rooms. I walked out into the courtyard and beds and shelves were everywhere. This was not so exciting… but after that, the kids made baleadas!! These did not have eggs or chicken, but they were still really good. After that, we all played water balloon volleyball. There were six people on a side. It was pretty sad because there wasn’t even a real net. There were two poles and then two lines of string for a “net.” The kids didn’t mind a bit because it worked. On each team, there were groups of two and those groups had a towel. We were supposed to catch the water balloon in the towel and fling it over the net with our partner. It was a lot of fun… but it was soooooo hot! I felt like fainting… until some of the boys took a big cooking pan and filled it with water and dumped it on me. Usually, I wouldn’t have wanted this to happen, but it felt so good after being in the hot sun. After volleyball, we went to the river again. This was a different place from the last time we went. This one had a little river pool. It was super deep and the kids were swinging on ropes and jumping in the water. It was also very dirty, but the other volunteers and I jumped in it anyway. The kids had a lot of fun and I’m glad we got to go.

I have to mention some other thing that bugs me like no other. There were creepers at the river… there were some at the water park too. They were just a bunch of older guys just kind of standing there in the water and watching the kids. The volunteers and I talked about punching them in the face, but instead, we decided to just watch our kids more carefully. Haha, we’re not really fond of the idea of dying in Honduras. I freaked out when I didn’t see two of the girls. I started asking all the volunteers where they were and one of them said they could see them under the bridge. I had a small heart attack. I’m becoming more and more protective of these kids. Even though I really miss home, it’s weird to think that when I do go home, the kids will still be here. I wish I could give them some of the stuff we have at home. I want to be able to take them to Disneyland or take them to a lake to go wake boarding or something like that.

Anyways, I feel like i’m a constant chaperone or school sponsor. I never realized how tiring it would be. I also feel like an old lady because even though it’s 9 (it’s 8 back at home), I’m about to pass out. Buenas noches.

September 21

I don’t know if the heat has really fried my brain, or if I’m just naturally forgetful… but either way, I neglected to tell you about a very exciting night that Tarynn and I had this past week. The mutant Honduran rain decided to pay us a visit the other night. I’m only remembering this because right now as I type, the rain is pouring so hard on the roof that I can barely hear anything and people are yelling. I almost feel like the rain is going to break the whole building down. I can feel the wind from outside in my room. The thunder doesn’t help me feel any safer either. Anyways, the other night, the killer rain decided to come through the roof onto Tarynn’s bed. The bottom half of Tarynn’s bed was soaked! We didn’t know what to do because Tarynn had to sleep somewhere and we were getting super tired. Since our beds were already pushed together, Tarynn suggested that we both sleep across the top halves of our beds. We really should’ve taken a picture because we looked pretty funny sleeping so smushed together. We stayed dry and we both actually slept okay. The next day, we had someone fix our leak. After we had someone go up on the roof to fix it, we almost regretted it because it sounded like the roof was going to collapse. We also saw his fingers come through the roof in a different spot and we can still see the sun through it. That spot only leaks a little and it’s not over our beds, so we’ve accepted that one. There’s also another little leak by the entrance of our room, but it’s not as bad. Haha, I guess we just can’t escape the killer rain.


Another exciting thing… I found another Jane Austen lover. Okay, well… it may not be exciting for you, but this was very exciting for ME. I’m sure it’s not hard to find a Jane Austen lover, but I still felt very happy… especially finding one in Honduras. I glimpsed at the book that Txus was reading and I thought it said Jane Austen. I was right! She was reading Pride and Prejudice. It is her favorite book… and mine too. I lent her mine because she wanted to read it in English. It’s a good thing I already finished it otherwise I’d have a little trouble parting with it. Tarynn opened up to a page and read a little bit of it to see if she might be interested in reading it after Txus. She read a few lines and then closed the book. Haha, I guess it’s not for everyone.

September 20

It’s Tarynn’s birthday today! We had to work today, but we got someone to cover us so that we could go to lunch and have some baleadas!! Woohoo! And after baleadas, we had some ice cream… woohoo again! After lunch we had to come back to supervise the kids at the pool. Yes, they have a pool… but it’s green… more like an algae pool than a swimming pool. It’s not always like this, but today, it was disgusting. The kids still wanted to swim and so Txus said to let them. They kept asking us why we weren’t swimming with them and I kept reminding them that the pool was green. These kids don’t care one bit about dirt... but I’m sure kids all around the world are like that. While we were watching the kids, some of the other ones were catching horses and riding them. If that sounds crazy to you, it’s probably because it is. I figure that the horses don’t have enough energy to really resist… most of the horses you’ll see are just skin and bones.

Ingrid came up to us while we were making sure the kids weren’t killing each other. She asked us if we wanted to go to the river. Of course, we agreed. After getting the kids out of the pool, we all started walking. It was maybe a forty five minute walk… especially longer with the kids. The walk was absolutely beautiful. There were trees surrounding the path and green everywhere. We had a few problems on the way, but we got over them. The first problem we encountered were the bulls. There were around 15 kids that went with us and so when the bulls came near us on the path, they were freaking out. One of the older girls would not keep walking. She turned around and headed back so Tarynn had to go get her. Some of the younger ones started to cry and I had some kids behind me and we just waited until they passed. Our next little problem was Margori. She had to use the bathroom. One of the boys was being a big jerk and wouldn’t leave so that she could do her business. I had to drag him some of the way and then pretend to race him the rest of it so that he started to run. If you get grossed out easily, you may want to skip over this next part. Tarynn told me that she didn’t just need to go to the bathroom. She really needed to go. She went “number two” and then went on and grabbed a leaf to finish off the job. She even got some on her shoes… it was a mess. There’s nothing like the great outdoors, hu?

The next problem we came to was the soccer game. There was a random field on the way to the river and there was a soccer game going on. The boys all wanted to stay. I would’ve said no, but Ingrid said it was okay. She had been a volunteer the year before and so she knows a lot more than I do, so I trust her. Some of the girls wanted to stay, but we definitely said no to that. So we… actually… Ingrid had to argue with the kids. It took a while, but finally we kept going. The river was pretty dirty, but it was still beautiful. There were mountains around us and large rocks that we had to jump across to get the river. I’m terrible with words so I can’t explain it... but it was beautiful.

The kids didn’t want to leave, but because we took so long getting there, we had to leave earlier. We had to get back before dark and before dinner. This is when the last problem happened. Some kids were running ahead of us and they jumped onto the back of the truck. I was further behind so I didn’t know what was happening. I saw Ingrid yelling at them and the truck went off with some of the kids in the back. When I caught up to her, she said that she told them to get off because she didn’t know who these people were, but the kids just laughed and went anyway. They waved at her as the car drove away. Ingrid was really mad when they left. We had no choice but to keep going. On the way, we saw some of the kids sitting on the side of the path. Ingrid yelled at them some more in Spanish. I love these kids, but it’s really hard to be patient when they don’t listen. It’s hard to get them to start doing things or to stop doing things. It’s a huge battle especially when you don’t speak Spanish. Some of them have even made Tarynn and I cry, but we know that they’ve been through a lot and they need our love.

Ingrid and I were talking on the way back after we found all the kids. She talked about how experiences like this give her a little glimpse of what God has to go through when he deals with us. He loves us so much and we disobey all the time even when all he wants is the best for us and for us to be safe. She said that she can’t be mad at them for very long because even though it hurts her when they don’t listen, she does the same thing to God. It’s so true. I’m sure parents feel this all the time when their kids don’t obey or when they do things that will hurt themselves. Thing is, God feels this pain all the time. And it’s not just for one child, it’s for countless people. He has a deep deep deeeeeep love for every human being... so imagine what He has to go through when so many people hurt him at once. I can’t even comprehend it. Sometimes I wonder why God keeps on loving us, but I can’t forget that He has called us His children. I think He gave people that parent-child bond to show us a little bit of what God goes through… because although it brings a whole lot of pain, the love between parent and a child also brings indescribable happiness too.

September 19

Happy Sabbath everyone!!

Today, Txus forgot about us. We were supposed to be the second group to go to church and we waited for a while until Amanda came and said we should probably start walking. The church is a little under a mile to get to and it wouldn’t have been too bad if we weren’t melting from the heat. We also had to walk though tall grass behind the Hogar to get to the road because the gate was locked. It scares me to think that tarantulas and snakes could have been very close to my feet without me knowing it. Anyways, I don’t want to dwell on tarantulas too long. After walking through the tall grass, we walked on the road. This road scares me half to death too. It’s like walking on a highway. Some of the drivers don’t care enough to slow down or move over just in case. When cars zip by, it’s like a gust of wind and sometimes I shiver thinking about how close they are to us. Tarynn and I walk this road everyday to get to the bus stop. I don’t know if I can ever get used to these fast cars so close to us. I felt sorry for the group of us that had to walk, but when I got there, I talked to one of the girls living at the Infa and she told me her story. She says that she walked all the way from the Infa. They left at 8 in the morning to get there. I instantly felt very foolish (I’m not one to use the word foolish very often, but I’ve been reading Pride and Prejudice and the word foolish seems very appropriate… haha, don’t make fun of me). This whole time I’ve been complaining to myself about how unfair it was that we had to walk, but this girl had to walk a lot further than we did. Tarynn and I take the bus to go to the Infa every day. We were so surprised when she said she had to walk that distance. I feel like I’ve taken a lot of things for granted and I’m realizing that here. There are so many things that these kids don’t have and at home I don’t think twice about having it. I’m definitely realizing that I need to be more thankful for everything because I am blessed with a lot more than I deserve.

September 18

So tonight we had the signature Adventist dish… haystacks. Except in Honduras, they have their own way of making it. They don’t have tortilla chips, so they use banana chips. I’m supposed to serve the kids and the first time we had “bananastacks,” or tajadas in espanol. I was very confused. The girls pointed at the banana chips so that I would serve that first. Then they pointed at the other stuff and I started to put it on the side of their plate. They proceed to laugh at me because every Adventist that’s grown up with the church knows how to make a haystack. I, however, stand my ground in saying that bananastacks are something completely different. ;)

Here in Honduras, there’s a thing called the soda phenomenon. Well, I’ve actually only heard of two cases, but I’m positive that it exists. It’s been affecting Tarynn and me every day. Tarynn and I crave sodas at all times. It doesn’t help that we’re in town everyday with the pulperias calling our names. Tarynn craves Coke and I crave orange Fanta. This is very out of the ordinary because Tarynn and I don’t drink soda at home. I refuse to drink soda at home because I find it so disgusting. And now we come here and it’s all we crave (that and of course bread, ice cream, bagel bites, jamba juice, pizza, etc… but those don’t count because I crave that all the time ). Anyways on to what I was going to say… this phenomenon led us to a pulperia. There are these pulperias, or little stands, everywhere. This one in particular had a very nice lady working at it. We had been there before, but we didn’t say much to her. Today we figured that we’re already slaves to the soda phenomenon and we might as well get to know the lady who is going to be feeding our cravings with her pulperia. We asked her what her name was and I really wish I could tell you what it was, but that’s absolutely impossible. We asked her what it was again and she blurted out this long jibberish and we were again very confused. She laughed at us silly Americans and she said to just call her Tonia. And so began our beautiful friendship with Tonia. We told her that we worked at the Infa and that we live at the Hogar de Ninos. Then she showed us a picture of some of her family that lives in North Carolina. She said that there was an American that came to Honduras and he met her daughter or niece or something and then came back to marry her later. And yes, this was all in Spanish. It was pretty hard to converse, but the lady was patient and she used her hands a lot. Then she gave us these frozen treats and two coconut bars for us to eat on the way back. This, amigos, is the way to my heart. Tonia, the pulperia lady is our new best friend.

Also, I thought I’d let you know… The bug bites are increasing. Honduras bugs are very grumpy. I thought they’d be kind and give me a break after a while, but no. It’s like they bite me and then go tell their friends to do the same. Boo for bug peer pressure.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

September 17

I now have a deeper understanding and respect for the saying “it’s raining cats and dogs.” Before I continue on with my story, I have to tell you that I cannot and will not accept that Honduras rain can ever be in the same category as California rain. This rain was made to kill. This rain was made to start disaster. This rain was made to soak Tarynn and I because we eat too much. ;)

Right before taking the bus, we saw Txus (pronounced choos.. she’s from Spain), one of the ladies in charge, at the center of Santa Barbara. She was loading like 20 of our kids into a van. They were all smashed in the van and it we were very surprised to see them. She asked if we wanted to ride with them, but we looked at each other with a little concern. We had just bought a slice of cake for each of us and we were pretty sure we could not bring it into the van without a riot of some sort. So instead letting heads fly, we decided to take the bus instead. There wasn’t much room anyways. Tarynn and I got on the bus and enjoyed our cake (mine was pineapple and hers was chocolate). On the way back, we saw the van fly by us because the bus had to make a lot of stops. We were already regretting that we hadn’t taken it. Next thing that happened was the mutant rain. It started while we were riding on the bus and by then we had completely regretted taking the bus. The bus stop isn’t right next to the Hogar. We have to walk quite a ways before we get to the Hogar. We could’ve made the journey quicker by running, but we were soaking wet anyway. We accepted our fate and we walked in the rain, laughing the whole way. When we got there, there was a group of kids there to laugh at us. One of the girls, Cindi, even came out into the rain to give us hugs. We greeted the rest of them with our wet hugs and we decided that this all happened because of our deep desire for carbs.

Today at the Infa, Nelson showed up and he talked to us for a bit. What he said really touched my heart and made want to do some much more at the Infa. He talked about some of the backgrounds of the kids. One of the girls, Anaely, is a sad case. Nelson said that people were sponsoring her because she was so sickly and she was going to die for sure if she did not get food and care. Nelson said that somehow they got money to give Anaely’s mother and they gave her food everyday. After a while, she had not gotten better. She had only gotten worse. Finally, they took her into the Infa during the day and fed her there. She started to improve and now she’s running and laughing and although she is very very very very skinny, she has food and she isn’t in danger of death. Nelson went to his mother and asked her what she had been doing with all of Anely’s food, but her mother told her that she didn’t know. She wouldn’t talk to Nelson. He said that later he found out that she had Leukemia and she died from it. Anaely now lives with her grandmother and Nelson is trying to get her to go to stay at the Hogar because she still needs help and her grandmother cannot give her all the help she needs, but the grandmother won’t let her leave. I thought it was so sad that even though Nelson wants to help Anaely, he can’t do much because her family won’t let her have the opportunity that she could have. Knowing her background, I just wanted to love her more. She always jumps on us and hugs us when she see’s us. She’s such a happy girl and I really hope her grandmother will change her mind. He said that he’d arrange a time for us to see the different families at the Infa. He wants us to understand what these kids have to go through and I want to know. It makes me want to do so much more and be more involved with these kids. He said that if we have an idea of things to do with these kids, we should just do it. The ladies in charge are not going to tell us to do stuff. We have to take things in our own hands. If we want to paint a room or start an English class or whatever else, we have to just jump right into it. There’s so much we want to do for the kids and Tarynn and I quickly told Nelson that we have been talking to people back home to help send stuff for the kids. He then told us that it’s a great thing that we’re looking to give them stuff, but he wanted to make sure we knew that first and foremost, these kids need love. He told us a story of a kid who used to work in the Center of Santa Barbara and he would shine shoes for his job. He did this while his brothers would play around at the Center. He acted super tough and even though he was young, he had a lot of muscles. Nelson brought them to him and whenever he would see them, he would play with the younger kids and hug them, but he didn’t hug the older boy. He would just talk to him because he figured that he didn’t want any hugs because he was too cool for that kind of thing. One day, Nelson was driving into the Hogar and the boy was sitting by the entrance with his head down. Nelson tried to find out what happened, but the boy wouldn’t tell him. When Nelson started to leave, the boy called his name. He asked him why he wouldn’t hug him like he hugged the other boys. He asked him why he wouldn’t love him like the other boys. All these kids want is love because no one loved them before. Nelson emphasized that whatever we do, we need to hug these kids and love these kids and let them know that they are important. He said that even if it seems like they aren’t thankful for it now, they will remember it for the rest of their lives. Nelson just got a call from one of the older boys at the Hogar and he said that he was sorry for not being more thankful for all that was done for him. He now realizes how great he had it and he called to thank him. Things like that really touch my heart. Nelson is really making a difference in these children’s lives and I’m excited to do the same. Today, when playing with the kids, I can’t really explain it, but I felt very energized and I felt different. I had always known that I wanted to love these kids because they didn’t have anyone to love them, but now somehow I feel it too.

Also, to anyone reading this, if you’re wondering if there are any ways to help… I have a few ways. You can always send any necessities… toothpaste, shampoo, toothbrushes, toys, clothes, etc. Or you can send me money to buy stuff for them. Either way would be wonderful. I will post the address soon. I can’t remember it for the life of me. Thanks everyone for all your prayers and for your help. It really means a lot!

September 16 - water parks in honduras make me nervous

Today we went to a water park. Yeah, I didn’t know they had those in Honduras… but they do. Tarynn used one word to describe it… sketchy.

The kids were really excited to go. Nelson told them the day before that if they finished chopping the grass then they could go to the water park. The kids got up (both boys and girls) at 5 in the morning to start chopping the grass. The kids all have machetes and they’re chopping the grass… it’s beyond dangerous. I can’t even explain how nervous I was for them. One of the girls sliced their knee open and she had to get stitches. But at the end of the day, it was all okay because they got to go to the water park. So we all woke up at 4:15 today to get ready. I didn’t sleep much at all last night so it was extra hard to get up. Then we all got into a bus (the poor bus driver) and we drove for 3 hours to the park. We went in and the first pool we see was empty. No agua at all. Then I find out that this pool was the main pool with the two main slides and there are other little ones around, but that’s it. After this large disappointment, we head to the beach. On the way to the beach there was a zoo. This water park was a weird mixture of all three. There was the slide-pool-water-park stuff/zoo stuff/beach stuff. The beach was beyond dirty, but the kids still had fun. I have to say that the animals were the coolest part. I also have to say that it made me a little nervous because there were jaguars, large snakes, large ostriches, etc. ….and you never know if these gates in Honduras are the real deal. Anyways, the kids had fun and that’s what really matters.

Some of us were talking about the ladies who run this place the other day. They’re sisters and one of them is on vacation in Mexico. These ladies are amazing. They’ve pretty much given their lives for these kids. Txus used to work as a teacher in America. She said that she worked near PUC for a little bit, but when she came to visit her sister, Maria Jose and saw all the help that was needed, she couldn’t stay working where she was. She left her good job and comfortable life in America and came to live here and raise these kids. They’ve given up everything to be a mother to these children who didn’t have anyone. Even though a lot of the kids don’t appreciate it, they continue. It’s a hard hard hard job, but they’re here anyway. It’s beyond admirable and I’m positive that God’s going to give them some pretty sweet rewards in heaven. They deserve it.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

September 14

I killed some more lice today. It’s not that it’s a very important piece of information.. and you probably don’t care that much. I just wanted to remind you that yes, I am still killing lice like the professional lice killer I am.

A more important fact: I’m sick. This sickness has been going around and I’ve had it since Saturday. I’ve been pushing myself to stay in bed all day. I’ve been able to catch up on a little bit of Pride and Prejudice, a book that I love… I’m guilty of reading it through many times. Other than Pride and Prejudice, it’s been pretty boring laying in bed all day, but I think it helped. Tarynn got to go to the river with some of the older girls… I was good and I stayed in bed. I cheated on Sunday when Tarynn and I took Fernando to lunch for his birthday. With my excellent Spanish, I struggled to ask him what he was going to do for his birthday. He said that he was going to church. At first I thought that his church was throwing a party for him, but he said that he was going to play piano for them. When I realized that, I asked him if he was going to have a fiesta, but he said no. He told me that his mother left on a trip with his two brothers and his sister was gone for the day. No one remembered that it was his birthday. He didn’t go with them because he had to play for church. Then I asked about his friends. I asked if he was going to have a fiesta with any of them and if they knew it was his birthday. He said that only his amigas did… and he said our names. I felt sooooo bad then. I wish we could’ve done more for him. I was so glad that we took him out to eat yesterday. We ate baleadas (which were heavenly) and we had some ice cream after (this was even more heavenly… ice cream never fails to make me happy). Then we asked him if he wanted anything for his birthday and he said he wanted shoes. So we went to the market and bought him shoes… for less than 20 bucks! Not bad, hu? Thing is, those weren’t the shoes he really wanted. They were nice, but he really wanted other ones in a store that was closed. We told him we’d buy them for him, but he couldn’t return the other shoes. It was sad, but at least he got new shoes for school.

Oh! And I forgot to mention that I sound like a man. Some of the kids make fun of me… especially Fernando. One of the boys called my voice bonito with an emphasis on the O... which is pretty much calling me a man. My voice drops like 10 octaves when I get sick. It’s like I’m back to my high school drama/theater days… Haha, don’t ask.

Another random useless piece of information: my bug bites are HUGE. They’re like little red mountains on my skin. When I showed some of the kids, they looked at me wide eyed and asked what it was. I had no idea how to say mosquito and so I just used my finger to act out a little bug flying and landing on them to bite them. They just laughed at the silly “china” girl who can’t take bug bites. Hehe. Oh well. Hopefully the bugs will lay off after a while.

Tengo hambre. Voy a comer. Hasta luego!

September 11

It’s September 11 and I feel weird not being home. Tarynn and I talked about where we both were when we first heard about the plane crashes into the World Trade Center. I don’t know why, but I feel like I should be home today. I feel like I should be home to remember the families and all the people who were killed. It’s weird knowing that things are passing by at home without me being there. It’s weird that September 11 is just another day to people here while it has so much meaning to me and people from America. I don’t know if I make any sense, but that’s what my little Filipino brain is thinking.

Anyways, today has been disappearing quickly… and our bread is another thing that has been disappearing quickly. I feel like I’ve eaten enough carbs to last me a lifetime. Some people said that I’d lose weight and other said that I’d gain it… Knowing my appetite, I’m pretty sure I know which one is going to happen. One of the first days here, Tarynn and I found an exercise tape and we’re planning to take advantage of it this weekend. We want to try and rope some of the girls into doing it with us too. They may think we’re crazy, but I’d rather be crazy than gordita. Sorry, I get way off track… I was going to talk about the Infa. We took Laurel with us to the Infa today. She’s a new volunteer from Southern. She was supposed to go to Africa, but something went wrong and she couldn’t go. The kids were really good to her and gave her lots of hugs and they renamed her like they renamed Tarynn. Laurel’s new name is Laura.

On Sunday, it’s Fernando’s birthday. We’re really excited because it’s our day off and Tarynn and I are going to take him out to eat baleadas and to have some ice cream. He’s one of the older boys at the Infa and he’s very very helpful. He’s the one that helped us find a piñata and candy for yesterday. I’m a big fan of this kid. He also made my job easier today when I was making sure the kids did their chores. I had to make sure that the boys were cleaning the bathroom (I wouldn’t really call it cleaning the bathroom, but I won’t argue). Fernando ended up doing more than he had to and telling the boys to do what they needed to do.

September 10 ... shearin the lice killer

Last night, I dreamed of tarantulas. I also had this dream where there were girls in our room and they were pouring bugs over our heads. I was half awake and half asleep because it felt so real and I kept thinking, where are the girls and why would they do that? Then I remember telling myself that I have to ask Tarynn if they were really in here. Now that I’m awake and sane, I realize that it was a dream … hehe and I’m very thankful for that.

On to other things… I’m feeling a lot better than I was feeling Sunday. Tarynn and I have been working at the daycare since Monday and it’s growing on us. The ladies in charge don’t speak English at all so it’s a good thing that Ingrid was there with us because her Spanish has been saving our butts. We got there and the kids were watching a movie (it was Stewart Little in Spanish… just in case you were wondering). After that, she told us that we had to give the kids baths. So we were pushed into the bathroom with the three open “showers.” The showers are stalls with pipes in the wall for the water to come through. The boys came in and a lot of them were fussing and telling us they didn’t want shampoo for the piojos because they didn’t have piojos. Piojos = lice. Yes, lice. I know. It makes me nervous too. You learn quickly that you can’t always believe what the kids say to you so we made them use it anyway. We made them jump into the ice cold water (I thought our showers were cold) and then they had to come back to us so we could shampoo their heads. Then they had to let the shampoo sit in their hair for five minutes before they could wash it out. Here we are, in a little flooded bathroom filled with little naked children that are jumping up and down with water everywhere and there is high pitched screaming (their voices haven’t changed yet). People are pushing each other and splashing each other and then they start using the soap for their hair. It’s complete chaos. Then it was the girls’s turn… another time of absolute chaos, but less rough. When all the girls were showering, there was this one girl named Jazmin who did not want to go in with all of her being. She said she was too scared to shower. I can’t blame her… that water was cooooollld and the lice shampoo looked like it burned some of their eyes. She started crying and then another girl started crying because she wanted to wash it off already. So there are a bunch of little girls squealing and jumping and crying and asking how much longer they had for the shampoo. Then the kids put on their dirty clothes to go to devotional. We’re hoping that we can get them to bring another pair of clothes if they have it so we can teach them that they need to wash their clothes.

Now on to the really dirty stuff… after the showers, the kids ask us to look for the little blood suckers. Silly old me thought they were joking (or at least I was hoping they were). Ingrid tells me that they want me to find them and kill them. I, ladies and gentleman, am now an expert lice killer. I’m seriously pro status. Disgusting, right? Haha, I thought so too… especially when I saw the kids’ hair. Some of these girls had lice nests… there were eggs everywhere. After the first day, Tarynn and I freaked out, we started scratching our heads off on the way home because we thought we had lice. I searched Tarynn’s head and another girl at the Hogar searched mine, but there was no sign of lice… YET. They say that we’re going to get it eventually, but we’re trying to stay away from it as long as we can. Now before we go to the Infa, Tarynn and I French braid our hair and put it up as close to our heads as possible because of our fear of lice. The lady at the Infa noticed and laughed at us as she pointed out our hair. She accused us of being scared of piojos and we didn’t deny it for a second. She laughed some more and pointed to her own hair which was in a neat bun and said that she was scared too. I figure that these kids’ parents don’t take the time to take the lice out for them so somebody needs to. I know that even thought it’s extremely disgusting, my mom would search through my head any day that I ask her to. I’m here because I wanted to love these kids… and if that includes picking and killing lice, then that’s what I’m going to do.

Today, September 10 is a holiday in Honduras! It’s Felicidades de Ninos. This is a holiday where kids are celebrated. They play games and have candy and all the other fun stuff they like. We asked Isabella, one of the ladies in charge at the Infa, what we were going to do today. She said that the people from the college might come to bring a cake, but other than that, there wasn’t anything for the kids. Tarynn and I quickly fixed this. We asked if we could go get a piñata. Fernando, one of our favorites, took us to the place where they sold piñatas and candy. Because Fernando was so helpful, we bought him some ice cream. He was excited, but I’m pretty sure he wasn’t as excited us. I have a deep deep love for ice cream.

The kids loved the piñata. It was a little hard to maintain anything close to an orderly circle, but we tried. After all the kids had tried to hit the piñata and there was no luck, it was my turn to hit it. I was actually supposed to break the whole thing. All the kids were kneeling on the floor, hands out, ready to be the one with the most candy. Little did they know, I am the weakest person ever. I have no strength at all whatsoever and so I didn’t break the piñata… even without the blind fold. I know, I know. My muscles need some work. Good thing Tarynn stepped in and broke it for me. As soon as it broke, she couldn’t move at all because all of the kids were moving in on her. It was a really cool sight to see and I’m glad we got to experience that with the kids (plus, we didn’t have to struggle to give them baths today so I’m okay with that. =) It’s their day and they don’t have to bathe if they want to. hehe).

I still miss home like crazy, but the days are going by faster here. I’m getting used to the routines and I feel more comfortable with them. My Spanish is getting better and so it’s a little easier to talk to the kids when they talk slow. I haven’t gotten used to the bugs yet, but I don’t think that’s something I’ll ever get used to. I’m pretty much a big baby. Who knows, maybe I’ll toughen up and start befriending the creepy crawlies… but probably not. ;)

Sunday, September 6, 2009

September 6

I have officially named Tarynn my hero. She went to look in the bathroom last night and there were like 5 cockroaches in the shower and another one just on the floor. She then proceeded to grab the Raid (I will forever be a spokesperson for Raid) to kill all of those flying, dirty creatures. After she killed them, I rolled up a wad of toilet paper for her and she picked them up and threw them away. Then there was a group of ants that showed up. These ants are not normal ants. They’re on steroids. These ants are HUGE. She sprayed more of the bug stuff on them and at first it seemed like more and more were showing up, but eventually, they all died. We had a lot of dead mutant ants in our shower. We talked to one of the girls from southern named Hannah, and she gave us the 411 on the bugs. She actually came in with her gloves and piece of paper and cleaned it for us while we were getting the kids ready this morning. The cockroaches can swim, that’s why they’re in our shower. They’re living in the cracks or in the drain and they come out just for fun and try to make us pee our pants. The ants are there because they know we hate cockroaches and they’re ready to pick up the leftovers. I stared at the drain while I showered just in case one of the cockroaches decided to swim upstream. I’m so happy Tarynn is here, otherwise I would be showering in the rain. Yeah, I pretty much owe her my life. You may think I’m dramatic… and that’s possible. But I can’t help it. Bugs scare me.

Anyways, on to other things… We had to get the kids up this morning. I felt terrible getting up this morning because of my lack of sleep. I’m looking more and more china. ;) I had to get the girls up this morning. I made sure they took a shower and did their chores. They had to sweep the floor, mop the floor, clean the shower, organize their shoes, take out the trash, and take out the laundry. Cindi’s job was to sweep the floor, but instead of only sweeping it, she took out the trash and organized the shoes also. The girls that were supposed to do that were gone for the weekend. She’s such a good girl. She obeys and does more than she’s asked with a little grin on her face. I love all these girls. Some of them are difficult, but I’m trying very hard to be patient with all of them. and there’s one especially that can get on my nerves, but I know that she’s been through a lot and I’m asking God to give me patience with her. Her name is Yenny and she’s had a very hard life. She has AIDS and she almost died last year. She has to deal with a lot. I had to give her medication this morning and more again tonight. She doesn’t obey when I tell her to do her chores and most of the day, she calls my name and tells me to go over to her. When I do, she laughs and says my name again. I go back to what I’m doing and she does it again. She just says my name and Tarynn’s name over and over again and then has no reason to do it. That’s it. I get really frustrated because I may be doing something with a kid or helping someone or whatever else and she just keeps saying my name over and over again and tries to get my attention even though I tell her to wait until I’m finished. I know that she needs love, and I know I’m terrible, but I’m going to admit, it’s very hard showing her that I love her because I get frustrated.

After lunch, we had pool duty. This is where we watch the kids. The lady we go to in case of discipline problems or anything is Maria Jose. She told us to not let them run, jump in the pool weird, or anything like that. I can’t tell you how hard it is to communicate this to them when I speak a different language. Kids were twisting, jumping, making pyramids, and splashing each other. I felt like everyone was doing what we didn’t want to do and it was chaos. We tried to tell them to stop Finally, we talked to Miguel and he said it was okay because when he was swimming, they did that all the time.



Later today:

I’m seriously about to cry. This morning was hard to get everyone up and ready, but tonight was really bad. I have such a hard language barrier and these girls don’t listen to me. I mean some do, but tonight, they were beyond stubborn. I ask them to do something and they laugh in my face. They were playing and someone got hurt. I told them to stop, but they kept doing it and there’s a crying girl in the corner and girls playing with a towel and another girl that’s constantly calling my name and other girls playing with a gameboy that I need to take away and another girl that is just running around hitting someone. It’s like having 11 children at once and having to control all of them at once. I love them and I don’t want to be mean, but I have to be. This is so hard for me. I’m overwhelmed and I don’t know what to do. Pray for me because my patience is running thin. One of the girls, Yenny, who has AIDS had a cut today… she kicked a table in the kitchen. That alone makes me freak out. The kids will eat off the table, no problem. I feel like it’s not a big deal to the staff, but it is! It’s a very big deal! There are children here with cuts and things are easily passed because this place isn’t exactly the most sanitary of places. I was really upset when Tarynn and I went to Maria Jose and asked about putting a bandage on her toe. Maria Jose said that she doesn’t need one. She said that it stopped bleeding. She said that it’s more of an issue in the states than it is over here. They say that it doesn’t matter as much. It may matter where we live, but they don’t worry about it. It’s like they don’t realize how serious that is. It’s very serious! And the girl keeps pretending like it’s bleeding to get attention and she doesn’t understand that I don’t want to joke around when it comes to this. It’s so hard. I get so frustrated so easily and I thought I had patience to deal with it. This wasn´t the only thing that was hard. We had to watch the pool too. Today was just terrible. I feel like I can´t do it. I want to be able to because I really love these kids already... it´s just so hard. it´s so so so hard. Anyways, there was one thing that kept me sane. When all the girls were finally in their beds, angry or not, they told me to sing to them. I wasn’t in the mood, but I sang the praise songs that they wanted me to so they could sleep and it made me remember why I came here in the first place.

Please pray for me. I’m tired and I´m overwhelmed.

Saturday, September 5

Happy Sabbath!!!

At church, I couldn’t stay awake. I tried so hard. I sat up straight and opened my eyes wide, but the next thing I know, my head droops and I catch it. The room was filled with people, it was warm, and everyone was speaking in Spanish. The little girl next to me was sleeping and I was tempted to wake her because I didn’t want to fight my sleepiness alone. But I didn’t wake her. She’s the biggest sweetheart, with a very small body. She’s ten years old, but she looks a lot younger, like a lot of the kids at the Hogar. Her name is Cindi and she’s one of the better behaved children. Everytime she sees me, she comes up to hug me. I absolutely love this child.

After preparing lunch, Tarynn and I passed out on our beds. We took a long nap and when we woke up, it was raining. This is not normal so cal rain. This is some serious business. It was hard to hear people talk when we had devotional (not that I’d need to. It wouldn’t make sense to me anyway). The rain was a blessing, though. It cooled us down. It was a nice Sabbath treat.

After dinner, we had a little staff meeting. The first one since we’ve gotten here and I’m pretty sure it will be the last one unless they have something to say to us individually. It’s a good thing for the two girls from southern, otherwise we would’ve been lost. They said that the two people leading the Hogar didn’t tell them what they were doing until later and they were so confused. Anyways, we got our assignments. Tarynn and I will be working at the Infa, which is the daycare. I’m excited! I start on Monday… but tomorrow, I’m supposed to get the kids up, make them do their chores, watch them swim, make them eat, make them clean up their food, etc.. It’s hard because Tarynn and I were sort of pushed into this. We don’t really know what to do. Good luck to us, I guess.

Oh and today, I was called a china. This is a term for asian. The Americans where warning me that people would call me that, but if the kids called me that, I’d have to tell them not to because it’s derogatory. One of the older kids saw a picture of me and asked who it was. When I told him it was me, he laughed and said, “You look china, but when you’re tired, you look more china.” I couldn’t help but laugh. I’m very tired. It’s hard to sleep at night. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m far away from home or because of the bugs. Or it could be because of the geckos that squeak. It’s been hard for me to get to bed and when I do fall asleep, I get up in the middle of the night and imagine tarantulas crawling at my feet. These tarantulas are very common. Ryan said that it feels like you’re crushing a lightbulb under your foot. Ewwwwwwww. I don’t know how it is, but I always end up talking about bugs. I can’t help myself. I’m absolutely terrified.

September 4

Internet is terrible. I have to type these entries out before I get on the internet because I never know when I can go online and when I am online, it goes too slow. I got super frustrated the first day because I started writing in the blog and when I sent it, the computer said: Error. The internet died after typing my novel out. Good thing for blogger’s autosave!

Anyways, today, we went into town. Ryan, the agriculture guy, bought us bagged water at the bus stop. It’s pretty much a bag filled with water and you bite the corner and you try and forget how dirty it probably is. I was sweating like a pig and so I put aside any fears of germs and bit the bag open. It helped cool me down and I was thankful for it. When we got to the center of Santa Barbara, we went straight to get a phone, but the people were on their siesta, where they take their loooong lunch break. I’m very jealous of this siesta business. I like my rest especially because I haven’t been getting much sleep over here. It’s hard when the bugs are threatening my life. ;)

We headed straight to Doloris’s house. Doloris is someone I have to mention. She’s a feisty little old lady who has been living in Honduras for 20 years. Ryan told us she was a California girl just like us. She let us in her house and she was talking about how old and forgetful she was and how she probably wouldn’t remember our names, but to forgive her anyway. While she talked to us, this little boy was running around the house, playing with his toys. He was curious about who we were, but was too shy to stay in the room for very long. Why would a little old lady from US have a little Honduran kid running around in her house? Well, for twenty years, Doloris has been taking in small children and babies who are malnourished and don’t have a home. She gives them a chance to live. She raises them and brings them back to health and sometimes, they go on to El Hogar. She’s an amazing woman, but she has to deal with problems in Honduras. She says that there was a time where the teachers went on strike and the kids were only taught 3 days a week for two hours. So the children are way behind in their schooling… they’ve lost amounts of school that is hard to make up, especially here in Honduras. She says that there are many more problems in Honduras including receiving medicine. There is also inflation happening in Honduras and her price for rent is going up and up and she won’t be able to pay it. She was told she had to move from the place she’s been for so long. She packed her stuff, but then was told that she can stay in it for one more year. Ryan suggested that we go with Doloris’s helper, Martha, to the more remote places where they find the children. I think it would be a good experience to see that and I hope that the people in charge of El Hogar let us go.

After that, we went to the day care. I can’t tell you how happy this made me. I’m a big fan of little children. I want to work with here for sure. Teaching scares me (not as much as bugs of course). When we got there, the children started singing for us. They asked us to sing a song to them and so we sang Jesus Loves the Little Children. I really hope they assign me there!

Next came food. This part makes me very happy also. We went to some place called Betty’s and I tried a Baleanas. It’s a tortilla with beans, cheese, eggs, meat, and avocado in it. It was really really good. I haven’t gotten sick from the food yet, but I’m pretty sure it’s going to happen so I figure I’ll just enjoy it. The two girls that came earlier than we did said that at El Hogar, sometimes there are ants crawling on the bread. They said to just shake it off and forget about it. They also mentioned not to watch how they wash the plates because it’ll disgust us. There are a lot of things I just try to ignore.

After we got our cell phones, we headed home. Because it was Friday, the kids didn’t have to sleep early so we were up with them. I brought out my ukulele. This probably wasn’t the best idea because everyone wanted to play it and they were angry that one had a longer time than the other. I decided that it was time to lay my ukulele to rest for the night.

I’m a little scared about taking care of the kids because I’ve never had an experience like this. I mean, sure I’ve been to vacation bible school and I’ve done some babysitting, but I haven’t actually had to care for a child. I have to be mom to these kids. I’m going to have to discipline them and be the bad guy and they may hate me for it sometimes, but I have to accept that because I love them and I want what’s best for them. Yikes. I sound like my parents. Haha, well, I’m learning and I think it’s going to be a good experience.

At dinner, I sit at the girls table. My job is to serve them and make sure they eat everything on their plate. I didn’t know that at first though. I was just sitting there looking at the food and asking why no one was eating. One of the girls, Marta, said that I had to serve them. Keep in mind, this is all in Spanish so the girls are laughing at me and I’m struggling to remember the words and say them in the right order. I think they say things, but I never really know. They were all looking at me and so I picked up the salad bowl and started scooping on each of their plates.

I know this is hardly a blog. It’s more like a novel… but it’s hard to limit what I say when there’s so much going on!!

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

I hate bugs.

I really have no idea where to start. I´m tempted to start with the fact that I´m in Honduras... and there are probably bugs crawling through my stuff as we speak... but that´s probably not a good idea because I could go on all day about how much I despise bugs. I´ll just start from when we got here.

We arrived in San Pedro Sula and the second I got off the plane, the humidity struck (I´m not the biggest fan of feeling sticky all the time). We were greeted by a nice man named Nelson and two girls from Southern Adventist University named Hannah and Amanda. I can´t tell you how relieved I felt when we were on that car ride and they were spilling advice on me such as how to get rid of lice (yes. lice) and how we should watch out for tarantulas (yes. tarantulas). It was so nice to have people who have experienced what you´re about to experience and can give you whatever you need to know. I can´t imagine being here all by myself like they did.

We stopped to eat at a Seventh Day Adventist restaurant. This was my first meal in Honduras and I have to say, it wasn´t bad. I don´t think I would mine living off of this for 9 months. We were talking to Nelson about how he came to work at El Hogar de Ninos. He said that the founder or head of Reach International came to visit Honduras. He was trying to speak to the people in his church, but no one understood English. Because Nelson knew some, he was able to understand why he was here. He was planning to help out with an orphanage. Nelson showed him around different areas and when the day came for Reach´s founder to leave, he handed Nelson a 9,000 dollar check. He told Nelson that he saw a great need and that he wanted Nelson to build an orphanage with that money. The man never asked Nelson for reciepts or anything, he just gave him the money and trusted him with it. It was 1994 (i think... i have a terrible memory) and Nelson started building. He built El Hogar de Ninos with the money and they had started with 7 children. After many years, they grew and grew and helped more and more people. He says that now there are around forty children staying at the orphanage and being helped. Just hearing Nelson speak about El Hogar and the children and his mission reminded me why I was here in the first place. God´s love was definitely coming out of this man. You could tell that he really cared for El Hogar and the people in it. He said that when you do things for God, you have to be prepared for the blessings that follow. El Hogar doesn´t only take in children who have no parents, but they take in children who need help, who are being abused by their parents or malnourished.

Which brings me to the part where Hannah was talking about the children. The children really don´t like it when El Hogar is called an orphanage. The children do have parents and even though they´re not taking care of them as they should, they still hold on to that as strongly as they can. She was telling me how sad it is when the child has a father who doesn´t take the time of day for their children comes one day and brings them a glass of orange juice and the child keeps repeating that their parents do love them because they brought them orange juice. They just want to be loved and that´s something I´m so ready to do. I want to make sure they feel loved.

Arriving at El Hogar was great. When our van parked, kids started trickling out of the front and looking at the two new strangers coming out with their massive amounts of luggage. They were so cute and so friendly. I half expected them to be on the mean side of things because of all that they´ve been through. They´ve had hard lives, but instead, they come and they say hola and grab our bags and they just wanted to talk to us. I was really touched and I can see how much God is working through El Hogar. These children are well taken care of and they´re happy. I´m glad to be apart of this.

The next part was the hard part. It was the tour of the place. Our room was really hard to take in. I can´t really explain it. We live in the little boys room. There´s a wall and door that doesn´t go all the way to the ceiling and so everything we say and everything they say can be heard. I heard the kids screaming the song deep and wide at the top of their lungs while in the shower today. oh and we found our first cockroach today. It was clinging on to the shower curtain... which by the way... showers are ice cold. The room is very small, and our beds are pushed together because of it. We also made less room by pushing our beds away from the wall. we refuse to sleep next to the wall. We´re not a big fan of crazy bugs. My first night here was very difficult. I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn´t go back to sleep. I felt like there were things crawling on me, but I didn´t want to look. I rolled in a ball for a while until I finally convinced myself that all they would do is bite me and that can´t be too bad. We slept in until 10 which will be the last time because the schedule has us wake up a little before six in the morning every morning.

This is only my second day here and there is so much to say. I´ve been trying to speak to the kids in spanish, but I have to say... it´s not working. My spanish is terrible. The kids are laughing at my failed attempts. I´m learning though. It´s going to take a looong time, but I´m excited.

Oh and we got a fan in our room today!!! You don´t understand how happy we are to have a fan in there. We were dying in there. I tried to write in my journal, but I couldn´t think because of the heat.

Okay, I think that´s it for today. The internet is crazy slow and I won´t be able to post as much as I want to, but I´ll try.

Goodnight! I´m off to sleep with the bugs.. tear...